Ok! So it's been a day or two since I've blogged, because I keep thinking I have nothing to say. Who am I kidding!! I always have things to say. I have a friend who jokes who needs a radio when I'm around..... very funny. It's true of course. I've always been talker just ask my Mama.
So I've discovered a new obsession. I was going to call it a passion, but that didn't quite cover it. Obsession is better. A craft store recently had a VERY NICE sale. At which I purchased a cricut. I all ready had the small one, but now I have the Mother of all Cricut's!! YES!! So then naturally I need things to go with it. So many shopping trips and half my life savings later, I have been cutting and downloading with a vengeance! I have discovered many fonts which make me smile, and vinyl in an array of colors. I've decided I really like sticking things to my wall. Hopefully Ryan won't
mind. Also I think I'd like to paint my front door, but that's another discussion for another day!
Back to my obsession. So I bought the little cartridges, and then a friend turned me on to this software!! It cuts from my cricut, but I can download FREE fonts!! This is amazing to me for a variety of reasons. The first one being I barely know how to turn on my computer let alone make fonts, make them into downloadable files and other such things. Modern technology amazes me! It also frustrated me, but that 's a personal problem....
Anyway so I found this program and I tried it for 15 days FREE! I love free. I love a good deal too, but I really love FREE. So then I'm hooked and I pay for all the rights and now I'm a cricut cutting fool. My butt is permanently stuck to this chair, and my kids always know where to find me.
That's how I roll these days. Good talking to you again!!
Later Gators!
~Annie

Everyone has a flow!

Ok... so it's been a little bit since I've found myself with reason to whine. Sad I only write when I wanna whine eh?? So I decided that this time I would share a bit of wisdom. ( bah hahahhahahahhahaha) ok pick your self up off the floor and finish reading.
Everyone has a flow. Everyone has a frequency that they function best at. For some it has to do with routine. Some can't break that routine or it all comes crashing down. For some they need reassurance. Some need to feel they are really being heard. Some need positive affirmations. Whatever it is, they are more productive, happier and well balanced when those in their lives mesh with the flow. Mom's tend to teach their flow to their children, but I personally believe we are born with our flow. And so mothers can try to teach the "correct" flow, but everyone will eventually tune into their own flow and make it work just for them.
The point to all of this is simple. If you really want to have lasting relationships, good friendships and minimize contention, you have to figure out what their flow is. Figure out how they work best and adapt to it when dealing with that person. For example I have a dear friend who has a routine flow. From certain times each day she helps her children and the rest of the world can wait. She greatly appreciates those who don't call or show up at her home during these times. She also appreciates not being chastised for ignoring those who do call or come by at that particular time. Know that at her home 4-6pm is kiddo time and nothing else and you will succeed with this friend. I have another who needs to know what she has done is appreciated. She will be the most generous person in the world with you, with any talent, time, or money she has as long as she feels it's appreciated. But the first time you seem ungrateful, you my friend have cut yourself off from the well. See, so now you just have to figure out what the flow is and how to go with it!!
Good luck!
~Annie
p.s. sometimes I'm not even sure what my flow is....so this can be kinda tricky :)

Someone please tell me why!!!

All right. I have questions. I need answers. Question one: Why is it, that I can scrub and scrub and scrub. Take three large bags of trash out, vacuum and still look around and feel like we're living in a pig sty!! Where does it all come from? Will it ever end? Is this some cruel sort of punishment for some wrong I don't even realize I've done. I'm sorry all ready! Please, I'm begging you! Make it stop. This is why I like yard work. Once I mow my lawn and make all those pretty lines, you can't undo them for me later that day! It takes a week or two!! By then I'm ready to mow again. Flower beds. You can't unweed them. Once I pull the little suckers out. They're gone. Tomorrow it will still look like I weeded the flower beds. Now that's satisfaction!
Question two: Why after you exercise can't you see an immediate result. Not huge. I realize you must work for it. All I'm asking is this. After I participate in a good work out... (which is rare for me) I just wanna see my belly not stick out quite so far, or see my arms jiggle just a little less. Then I'm motivated to keep it going. And if I miss a workout, then my belly can flab right back out, or my arms have my permission to jiggle freely!! All I'm asking is to see that my sweat, blood and tears are making a difference. I can't wait months to see it. I'm not a patient person. Don't believe me?? Ask the King. Actually ask anyone, they'll laugh in your face and tell you patience is a virtue I'm lacking! I wanna exercise. The problem is I hate it. I don't like how it feels. It's uncomfortable. I stink when I'm done. I don't have great endurance, and if you haven't figured it out yet, I'm a whiner. So exercise isn't a natural thing. But I wanna be healthy. I wanna be thin. So just why oh why can't I have a little teaser of what's to come!? Why can't I get just enough to be motivated to keep it going. WHY??
Well now I'm wound up and confused so it's time for a Dr. Pepper. I know counterproductive, but guess what!? I like it. So there.
Too-da-loo!
~Annie

The Deed Is Done

Well it's done. It happened, and now we're trying to get back to living. Ok so for right now it really isn't too bad. We're happy and except for a few nighttime meltdowns, we're back to "normal". Night time is when things seems to hit home. Ash wants to know where her Daddy is, and why he can't come home. When I tell her it's going to be a long time she says "sooooo Saturday?" Nope he's not coming home on Saturday. Then she cries "it's not fair!" And really it's not. But life isn't fair. It just seems that a three year shouldn't have to learn that lesson quite yet. Layne understands though except he's ticked that Dad will miss Christmas. I think this deployment is stirring up more emotion for my kiddos than the others have. They're just older. The get it a little more.
We will overcome! Ok that's a little dramatic. But really we're gonna be great. We are survivors. Life is too short to dwell on the unfair and hard. We like to focus where we are sooooo blessed. And we are. And if we keep ourselves busy, the time will start to fly!
Well this one is short, but I've said all I have to say. And now I'm the only adult in the home, I have much to do! So until next time!
Too-Da-Loo!
~Annie

Stepping back on the soapbox.... shocking I know!!

So.... deployment time. Here's what it entails, at least for us. I guess all branches do things differently.... heck all units do things differently. First come orders! They make the official really official. Makes sense huh. Then comes the paperwork. The soldiers have millions of paper to fill out every time they deploy. When I say millions I'm really not kidding. It's not an exact count cause hey have you ever counted to a million.... takes a long time!! But really they take several days to do all the red tape paperwork. Then comes the fun part. Verification. Except I think that the soldier think that we're bluffing when we say, we will be calling for verification. So there's a very beautiful and sweet woman, who works for the Battalion. It's her fabulous job to call all these people and make these verifications. Let me share some numbers with you just so you understand where she's coming from.... there are probably one thousand soldiers that she represents... close to anyway. Each soldier is required to fill out Next Of Kin information sheets. These are what we are trying to verify. Each soldier is required to have a Primary and a Secondary. They can have more, but no less. So this is at least two thousand people she is trying to call and verify the information! So she asks for help and I volunteer. Cause I'm nice like that!! haha. Anyway, so she give me a small stack. Let me tell you people!!! When the form says person must live within Colorado state boundaries, why oh why are we listing our long lost relative in Texas!!! Hello?? And when you list your mother as next of kin but list your home phone number here in Colorado as her number, when she lives in Pennsylvania, how are we supposed to contact her? HMMM HOW?? Then there are the people who list their neighbors as next of kin, and even better don't tell them. So when some crazy lady from Ft. Carson call to verify they are totally taken back that they have been listed as next of kin!! I shouldn't be the one breaking this news to them. ARGHHGHGHGH! It's crazy.
It has been my experience not just for this, but in general. That if a form, especially an official form, asks for information, it's good to list accurate information. Oh! and it's good to actually fill in the blanks! It has also been my experience that if there is policy about something, especially as important as a deployment, that there is good reason for that policy to exist. Now sometimes things are out dated or old fashioned, but I don't believe next of kin falls into this category. Is like the warning on preparation H. It tells you not to eat it. I don't' know what happens if you eat it, but I'm sure there's some fool out there that does! And that is why there is now a warning that says do not ingest orally!
I think these soldiers think they are invincible and that the ARMY doesn't need the info because nothing is going to happen to them. Well those people are usually the idiots who walk into bad situations without thinking, and get hurt. And then the whole brigade turns upside down because the next of kin can't be notified. Chaos ensues and a whole lot of bawling wives create a HUGE headache for the poor souls left behind to deal with all the Estrogen. So for the love of Pete!! Fill out the form. Do it correctly. Be accurate. Tell the people who need to know. Use some common sense!! I mean after all we do let you play with guns!

Why can't things just make sense???

Ok so if you know the ARMY at all none of this will come as a surprise... but the ARMY and it's "protocol" just doesn't make sense to me!!! Here's my latest gripe. The King is heading out to "The Sandbox" and while he's out there his contract ends. Our plan is to go back to the Utah National Guard, and gain civilian employment. This is what I want, not him, well mostly me and little him. But it's the plan. So we got the official orders to deploy. Ryan goes over to the JJPSO office (the moving people) He wants to make arrangements for them to move me home. We all ready know this is gonna be a battle so he went prepared. They tell him they don't move spouses just because the soldiers deploy. We say we know. We don't want to move just because he's leaving. We want to move because he's getting out. They say, nope. He says why? They say because you can't do that without orders. He says I have orders. They say we don't accept depoloyment orders they have to be orders to get out. So he goes he talks with the Col. The Col. says he'll see what he can do. He talks to some people. Orders can't be cut until a certain number of months before he gets out... But he also says we're not asking for anything they wouldn't do for us anyway. He suggests just talking to a supervisor. So off to the supervisor we go. We explain everything to him. He says it makes perfect sense. We thought ah ha!! Yeah someone who gets it. WRONG. Even though it makes sense he says no. If I move you for a deployment I have to move everyone!!! ARGHGHGHGHGHH.... not moving because of deployment... HELLO???? Is anyone home. NOPE. So we say fine. We'll just move ourselves and then when we qualify for orders we'll just turn in reciepts for re-imbursement. Oh no. That no workey either. Reciepts can't be more than 60 days old. Are you kidding me!!!??? So I have to waste $1500 a month to stay in Colorado, because why??? Because we don't have a piece of paper. Awesome. Thanks ARMY. Thanks for taking care of families. Thanks for taking care of soldiers who serve. You rock.
I'm moving anyway.
AMEN.

Impending Doom!

For some reason, it hit me today, like a tons of bricks. Ryan is getting ready to deploy. I knew it before. Talked about it even, but for some reason today it became so real. Maybe it's because I counted the Saturdays till he goes and we only had nine. Single digit nine. I don't know.... Funny how things just hit you sometimes. And because I've done this before the alone part doesn't seem so scary. I hate it. But it's not the unknown. And I feel at peace that Ryan will be protected and safe while he's gone. But I'm still worried. I mostly worry for my children. This is so hard on them. Layne is at the age where he needs Dad, for boy things. And Ashlynn just adores him. She chooses him for just about everything. She's Daddy's little princess. I'm worries about how she'll take it. Will she remember him? I don't know. I also worry about when it's all done. We're supposed to be going back to civilian life. Can we make it there? We are so used to being apart. I know we can survive apart, it's together that seems strange and almost scary, yet it's what we ultimately desire most. Some of you have probably come to the conclusion that I've lost my mind. Maybe I have. But there are some who have lived this life, and this makes sense, kind of.
Truthfully, I'm scared we'll get what we want too. We want to go back home. Live in our house and be a "normal" family. But we're so used to this life, what if we get what we want and it's not what we wanted?? ARGHGHGHGGH. My brain is going crazy today. This is the part of deployment that I hate. The uncertainty. The what ifs. The feel that your life is on hold for 12 months. I don't like being on hold for 12 minutes. I guess once I tackle this challenge, and learn what is meant to be learned the Lord will allow me to move onto something else. Oh I hope I learn my lesson this time!
~Annie